{"id":1360,"date":"2009-02-26T06:28:00","date_gmt":"2009-02-26T06:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/?p=1360"},"modified":"2013-06-04T15:05:40","modified_gmt":"2013-06-04T15:05:40","slug":"the-glass-is-half-full-only-dont-count-the-buts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/the-glass-is-half-full-only-dont-count-the-buts\/","title":{"rendered":"The glass is half full, only don’t count the ‘buts’"},"content":{"rendered":"<\/div>\n\n\n\n
\"Afghan<\/a>It\u2019s now seven days since my ignominious return to Kabul and if a week \t\t\tis a long time in politics this particular one seemed to go on forever. \t\t\tWinter goes so slowly here<\/a> and even though I\u2019ve arrived at the arse end \t\t\tof it, spring can\u2019t come soon enough. The streets are a relentless tide \t\t\tof light brown effluent rich muddy ooze but in Willy Wonka World it \t\t\twould be a glass and a half of Cadbury\u2019s Milk Chocolate ooze<\/a> and, for \t\t\tone of the few remaining Westerners who still sloshes, ankle deep, \t\t\tobliviously around the streets of Kabul, that\u2019s my positive way of \t\t\tlooking at it. \t\t\t<\/p>\n

Spring means lighter nights and warmer weather and a definite uplifting \t\t\tin the mood of the expats who\u2019ve done the full four-month winter \t\t\tstretch here but<\/strong> as the snow melts and the roads become clearer the \t\t\tresurgent Taliban are also awakening from their winter break and for \t\t\tthe first time in a long time everyone here agrees upon something: this \t\t\twill be Afghanistan\u2019s toughest year since 2002. After the recent \t\t\tco-coordinated suicide attacks<\/a> on various government ministries last \t\t\tmonth everyone is again paranoid and the underlying climate of fear so \t\t\tprevalent last November has been reignited. It\u2019s an election year and \t\t\tthe surge is about to begin. The mainstream media\u2019s narrative is \t\t\tratcheting up. It seems like they want this to be the new Iraq. The \t\t\tRussians are warning of history repeating itself and Obama has just \t\t\tvolunteered 17,000 new US troops for the new Muslim Jihadi meat \t\t\tgrinder<\/a> . <\/p>\n

But <\/strong>I am also a volunteer. This week I applied to be embed \t\t\twith the US forces as a photographer in Wardak \u2013 one of the key strategic areas that \t\t\tborders Kabul. The process is simple and quick but unlike the British \t\t\tArmy who have some monthly board meeting in Whitehall to discuss your \t\t\tsuitability, with the Yanks it\u2019s a two-page A4 questionnaire, you give \t\t\t\u2018em your blood group and one email later you\u2019re the next Robert Capa<\/a> . <\/p>\n

\"Afghan<\/p>\n

Wardak province,<\/a> if you believe the doom merchants (and we\u2019re not short \t\t\tof them out here), is now virtually controlled by the Taliban. It\u2019s \t\t\ttotally impossible to travel there individually without a death wish or \t\t\tsome serious close protection. That includes locals who do business in \t\t\tKabul, or work with NGOs. Any Westerners who venture out to what can \t\t\tonly be described as Cheyenne country<\/a> , would be kidnapped upon arrival \t\t\t(they have spotters on the roads out of Kabul looking for scalps). Only \t\t\tthere\u2019s nowhere really to go out there. So why would you?<\/p>\n

Well… funny you should mention it but last weekend I visited the \t\t\tGovernor of Wardak for a \u2018party\u2019. This was my second visit. I first \t\t\twent there back in November and was amazed at the contradictory \t\t\tattitude of the governor who did his utmost to convince me that Wardak \t\t\twas on the up (\u2018up in flames\u2019?). But <\/strong>I went along with his upbeat \t\t\tattitude, visited a Women Against Violence Conference<\/a> and did a grip \t\t\tand grin tour of rebuilding projects in the downtown area. We had you \t\t\tmight call \u2018close support\u2019 during the visit and I was never more than \t\t\ttwo yards away from an AK. The Governor is a high profile target and \t\t\this assassination would be a real coup for the Taliban. That same night \t\t\twe visited an army outpost about half a mile from his home. But<\/strong> this \t\t\twas as far as his Kingdom stretched. His Green Zone if you will. The \t\t\trest of the 9,000sq km of Wardak province? Well, someone else currently \t\t\tgoverned that. I think we can guess whom.<\/p>\n

So three months on, with the surge about to begin, and at the personal \t\t\tinvitation of the Governor, I traveled back to Wardak. The short trip \t\t\tout there, tucked into the back of a police truck was stunning. As we \t\t\tgunned through this winter wonderland the thought of a waiting IED in \t\t\tthis South Asian Lapland was as far away from mind as possible.<\/p>\n

Tonight was a night for singing and dancing with a special performance \t\t\tby the world famous AH Kandahari and his four-piece combo. To set the \t\t\tscene, the venue is a small room at the Governors house, there are \t\t\taround 30 men and one woman all sat on toshaks on the floor drinking \t\t\ttea.  Beards are de rigueur and the only one not sporting facial hair \t\t\tis the Governor and I (oh and the girl). Guests are mix of local \t\t\tMullahs, ex-Mujhadeen, businessmen and some \u201cspecial\u201d American guests. \t\t\tConversational topics are the same as Kabul; the upcoming elections, \t\t\tKarzai\u2019s failure to curb corruption, the surge and the latest wheeze of \t\t\tre-arming the locals in the form of Personal Protection Forces<\/a> . <\/p>\n

It may \t\t\thave worked in Iraq but<\/strong> the old Mujahdeen sat next to me has first hand \t\t\tknowledge (albeit with three missing fingers) of the Russians’ abysmal \t\t\tfailure using the same old divide and rule strategies. Despite his wish \t\t\tfor peace and his declaration that, \u2018war is not the answer\u2019 he talks \t\t\tfondly of his own personal history and how the Russians lost a whole \t\t\tdivision in one year between here and Logar. This man is a living \t\t\thistory book and I could listen to him all night. Especially the story \t\t\tof one wounded Mujahdeen they buried in the snow inside a sleeping bag \t\t\tto keep him alive!<\/p>\n

\"Afghan<\/p>\n

But<\/strong> tonight is not about Afghanistan\u2019s Descent into Chaos<\/a> its about \t\t\tlife and music. Abdul Hameed Kandahari is a famous singer from Kandahar \t\t\tand for the next three hours he serenades the crowd with poetry and \t\t\tsong, some of it uplifting, some more soulful. The crowd loves it. Only \t\t\tI have no idea what\u2019s going on \u2013 oblivious to Pashto, \t\t\tHindi and Dari, as well they know. That is until his final curtain \t\t\tcloser; \u201cI am a truck driver\u201d. A song for some strange reason that has \t\t\tan English chorus accompanied with charade-style impressions of a lorry \t\t\tdriver. It brought the house down and three days later I am still \t\t\thumming it. For an encore he does a quick stand-up comedy routine with \t\t\tMr Kandahari camping it up telling an obviously sexually-based joke \t\t\tabout someone from his hometown. Afghans love to poke fun at Kandahar\u2019s \t\t\tfamously ambiguous sexuality<\/a> . Wardak maybe the new Fallujah but<\/strong> everyone goes to their beds happy.<\/p>\n

The next day it\u2019s back to Kabul. Cut to me walking round the small \t\t\tshops in the Taimini district where I live in search of dog food for my \t\t\tthree-month old Afghan puppy Eidie (I found in a rubbish tip on Eid). \t\t\tMy Dari is limited. I know the word for dog \u2013 \u2018sag\u2019. I\u2019m gesturing like \t\t\tI need to eat and I am barking at shopkeepers. Life here is far from \t\t\tnormal but<\/strong> that\u2019s got fuck all to do with Al Queada. Long may this \t\t\tversion of insanity continue.<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Our own Afghan Hound reports from a muddy Kabul and his journey to the embattled Wardak Province for a night of song and dance. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1357,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[19],"tags":[638,549,636,634,635,637],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\nThe glass is half full, only don't count the 'buts' - FOTO8<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/the-glass-is-half-full-only-dont-count-the-buts\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The glass is half full, only don't count the 'buts' - 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Let me introduce you to them.\u201d","rel":"","context":"In "Blogs"","block_context":{"text":"Blogs","link":"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/category\/online\/blogs\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Afghan Hound","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.foto8.com\/live\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/09\/image-4.jpg?fit=470%2C313&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1466,"url":"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/killing-time\/","url_meta":{"origin":1360,"position":2},"title":"Killing Time","author":"Jon","date":"01 Mar 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Welcome to Bagram Airbase, Afghanistan, just over one hour\u2019s drive from Kabul. 45 minutes on a smooth, paved road North out of Kabul, unfortunately the last two miles is rutted pathway that\u2019s miraculously combines mud and dust in equal measures. It\u2019s a pretty good re-creation of the Somme .","rel":"","context":"In "Blogs"","block_context":{"text":"Blogs","link":"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/category\/online\/blogs\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"bagram01.jpg","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.foto8.com\/live\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/03\/bagram01.jpg?fit=470%2C313&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1752,"url":"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/kabul-coalition-of-the-swilling\/","url_meta":{"origin":1360,"position":3},"title":"Kabul – Coalition of the Swilling","author":"Jon","date":"09 Jul 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cAlcohol... Now there\u2019s a temporary solution.\u201d In a country full of half-measures and empty promises the wisdom of Homer Simpson definitely hits the spot here.","rel":"","context":"In "Blogs"","block_context":{"text":"Blogs","link":"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/category\/online\/blogs\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"drunk_anonymous-3_copy_copy.jpg","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.foto8.com\/live\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/07\/drunk_anonymous-3_copy_copy.jpg?fit=470%2C313&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1921,"url":"https:\/\/www.foto8.com\/live\/a-to-the-motherfing-z-welcome-to-the-acronym-riddled-ngo-ghetto-that-is-kabul\/","url_meta":{"origin":1360,"position":4},"title":"A to the motherf***ing Z: Welcome to the acronym-riddled NGO ghetto that is Kabul","author":"Jon","date":"01 Nov 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"In with a bullet at number one is ACBAR! \u2013 The Agency Coordinating Body For Afghan Relief. 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